The ghost[s] in my backyard

New Orleans is famous for its mystery and intrigue. This is a well-known New Orleanian trope but one I largely ignored before I left and for some time after I arrived. Even after our next door neighbor introduced herself and made it known that she was pagan and did rituals in the backyard, I wasn’t too concerned. Perhaps especially after meeting Dorothy, I thought even less about spirits and that sort of stuff because she’s so normal and that whole mystical thing lost all of its mystique. She told us that she blessed the backyard prior to our arrival and that we didn’t need to worry about any bad spirits or bad vibes. This was a kind gesture and we all appreciated it. Caitlin even brought her back some New Mexican sage when we were out at Ghost Ranch so that she could bless whatever else she wanted.

All this being said, our backyard is CREEPY. Dorothy’s four stumps where she did her rituals are there, representing the cardinal directions. I know this means nothing at all, they’re just four stumps, and I’m an open-minded guy. It’s just another religion’s communion table, right? But combine the stumps with the overgrowth, the empty lot next door, and the abandoned house and shed directly behind us, and you’ve got a creepy backyard!

We had a dryer donated to us by Gentilly Presbyterian. Very generous. The problem is it didn’t come with accouterments. So I went to Home Depot and got some. Our laundry room is outside the house, an enclosed room off the back porch. In order to attach the fixtures, I needed some wrenches from work. I borrowed two wrenches today but had to drive my co-worker David to pick up his truck right after work. Then, we had a fellowship dinner at Lakeview Presbyterian. The girls are at Target and I came home by myself. I thought to myself, “You’ve got the wrenches, it’ll only take a second, why don’t you install the dryer?” I walked to the back room with my wrenches, turned on the outside light, and opened the back door. Just at that moment, the wind gusted up and the trees outside shook their branches at me. This cast scary shadows in the windows of the abandoned house and the wind blew in at me, chilling me to the bone.

Of course, I experienced all of this in the 1/2 second it took me to say “Screw this” and close the door. So now I’m sitting in our front room watching the baseball and trying not to feel like an idiot for being afraid of my backyard.

Finally, an editorial note regarding the baseball. Is anyone else as bored as I am with this whole “Red Sox Nation” nonsense? I’ve never seen a [North American] sports team this good that bored me this much. May I add that Red Sox fans (barring my dear friend Anne Lange) are the most obnoxious in all of [North American] sports?* Long live the Colorado Rockies.

*I say North American because I will concede that the English soccer team Chelsea FC were as boring (when they were good) and its fans remain as obnoxious.